THE LETTER
-Priyadarshan Karunanithi
The old envelope fell slowly on the floor from the ceiling
attic. She could hear the annoying noise of the living room ceiling fan. The
whole vibe was dark. In fact she never really cared about stuff that was stored
on the compact space in the ceiling. But those times were different. Her eyes
were red, because of all the weep she did. Her hair was messy and her face was
extremely pale.
She couldn’t even remember the time she had food. But she
knew that was almost 18 hours back. What else could a woman do when she hears
that the flight her husband boarded met with an accident. To add fuel, what
could a woman do when she sees her husband’s name on the victims list. Weeping
generally means the initial time of the grief. What that is more painful is to
stare, painfully into the darkness without a single tear rolling down the face.
That was the level she was on in the pain scale. Her parents were yet to
arrive. So for the next few hours she had to put herself together. For the time
being the only company she had was the envelope. The air was chill and so was
she.
She took the envelope with her trembling hands. She
shivered, not because of the grief but because she identified the envelope. It
had her husband’s name on it Rahul H Chandran in bold letters. Her eyes became
wet once again, after almost six hours of tearless grief. She opened the
envelope- It was a letter, the first letter her husband gave her for their
first year anniversary. She knew each and every line from the letter. Even though
she knew each and every punctuation the letter had, she felt like she was reading
a never ever read letter. Her spine felt the chill.
After being married for a year they were leading a calm life.
Although theirs was an arranged marriage both fell in love eventually as time
went by. People never really know what they are destined for unless or until
they reach it. Rahul was an extrovert and she was quite the opposite. As newly wed
couples always face, they were not into one another as soon as they got
married. Eventually, that changed. She took some time, but ultimately she was very
much in love with Rahul. Years passed, the bond grew strong. Rahul had to
attend a board meeting in US and he left, only to make her eyes read Rahul H
Chandran on the victims list the government released after few hours of the
accident that took place during the take-off!. Immediately after seeing the news,
she went into an eternal darkness.
She was holding the letter with a feeble grip. Her eyes
wandered over the letter. That was the first letter Rahul wrote for her. The
letter went like –
“One
year it seems ! I am not good at this, still consider this as a love letter. We
never really had a fight during our initial days of marriage, because we never
really talked with each other. Whenever we talked, the conversation was
limited. It was like I was married to someone whom I never should have married
in the first place LOL. Then came the twist. My God ! Who would have thought
some few months of staying together will build a bond between us. You may think
I am exaggerating things, but in fact I got to know you better only after few
months. Now I am sure that I am married to the right person and yeah, I am not
good at putting things on paper. But I am sure that you will get what I think !,
well at least in the near future To more
years and more love !
Yes, Happy anniversary Love!- Rahul ”
It was very much simple for her when she had read the letter
for the first time. But now, with her emotions and hormones peaking, the letter
weighed like a ton. Rahul took one year to believe in arranged marriage, she
took around two. Rahul didn’t see her like she doesn’t love him during the second
year. She never really fitted in Rahul’s world according to herself. She didn’t
know that Rahul saw her as his world at that time. May be because she needed
time or may be she never really understood herself, but the exceptional affection
that Rahul showered on her made her realize herself that she fell in love with
him eventually.
All that to see him like this ? She thought.
May be because it was
meant to be like this as it always is- she exclaimed internally in agony
She badly wanted to see him. She was in guilt that she didn’t
love him enough. She was in pain that she even thought that if not for her, the
accident would not have happened. She was on the verge of losing her mind completely.
She imagined scenarios where she would lead a very much happier life with him
than the one she spent. She wanted the time to stop. Her pain was reaching
heights that no one could pacify her. She wanted to experience the love for him
one more time. She wanted Rahul to comfort her. She wanted him alive, back from
dead.
Her mind drifted in space and she reached the height of
grief and agony that she didn’t mind the grip. The letter slipped away from her.
The windows were open. The letter flew outside, reached the road. The sun was
setting. It was a calm Sunday evening for the road, just not for her.
The letter got the attention of someone. He took the letter
and held it to his eyes. Rahul H Chandran realized it was his letter to his
wife. It was Rahul Hariharan Chandran who unfortunately died in the accident,
not Rahul Hariprakash Chandran, her Rahul. He just returned from the hospital
after suffering from minor injuries and concussion. He could not process
clearly, but he knew she would be suffering. He took the letter and put quick
steps towards his house. She heard steps approaching the door, deep inside she
knew whose those steps were. The door opened.
THE END
